A Soldier's feelings
by thebuzzingbee
Summary: Toward the Terra fanfic! :D Jomy feelings of guilt mix with the want to see his parents again. Take Place before they reach Terra in episode 23 but after the rescue of the mu that the humans keep hostage. Please read and reveiw!
1. Part 1

Hey all fans of "Toward the Terra"! Here comes a fic about what could have happened during the journey to Terra. It take place after they rescue the station where the quarantined Mu is being kept by the humans (episode 23) but before they reach Terra. It mostly revolves around Jomy's guilt and him wanting to see his parents again. This will be a very short fic, but I will hopefully have time to write more some other time =) And if you see some grammar mistakes, please tell me so that I can improve ;D

Slight indication of JomyxLeo.

**A Soldier's feelings**

A young man paced in a dark room with blue dim lights. The room was known as the "Blue Room". It was named after the Mu's former leader, Soldier Blue. Blue's successor Jomy Marcus Shin couldn't keep himself still, there were too many thoughts that roamed his mind. They had successfully rescued the Mu that the humans had held hostage on the station that orbited around Jupiter and were now heading for Terra. They had also received a message from Swena Dalton. She had told them that her daughter and Jomy's parents was on the station.

That information had put his mind in confusion. He really wanted to meet his parents again, but he was also afraid. Afraid of how they would react on him being the leader of Mu. He was responsible for so many lives that had been wiped out. First it was Naska and then came all the victims from the battles they had fought with the humans. How could they not resent him for what he had become, when even he resented himself? He hated fighting, but he also believed that this was the only way to unite humans and Mu and destroy the SD system.

"_Soldier?__"_ resonated a voice inside his mind.

"Leo?" he said, turning around to see his friend standing in the shadows.

"_Are you alright, Jomy?"_ Leo asked through telepathy.

Jomy looked at him for a second, turned around so he had his back to Leo and then lied; "Yes, I'm fine".

Leo stayed silent and waited for him to say something more; he could feel that Jomy wasn't truthful. He was a patient person and was willing to wait for Jomy to open up to him on his own terms.

'What would I do without Leo?' Jomy thought to himself. 'He's always stayed by my side, even when I first arrived here after Blue rescued me during my Adult exam and called the Mu monsters. How come he doesn't dislike me?'

"Leo…" he began, but broke off before he could say anything.

"_Jomy, I will always be here by your side"_ Leo smiled encouraging at him.

The silence was deafening.

"How can you say that?" Jomy questioned after a while. "How can you still bare to be with me? I, who is responsible for so many deaths?!" he turned around to face his friend.

Leo stood still, not saying anything. He could feel the distress from the young leader clearly now and he could see tears streaming down his face. He was not sure how to soothe his friend because he was not sure what had made Jomy this upset.

Jomy turned around again to face the bed. "I wish to be alone for a while, can you make sure so that no one will disturb me?" he pleaded, voice thick with back held tears.

Leo stepped forward until he stood right behind his friend, and he put one of his hands on his shoulder. _"Do you really want me to leave?"_ he asked. He could feel Jomy tremble under his touch, not being able to stand it; he draped his arms around the other man's body, embracing him.

Jomy stiffed at the touch, hesitant of opening up to Leo; afraid that his emotions would overwhelm him. "Leo?" he asked uncertainly.

"_It's okay to cry__"_, he whispered.

Jomy could feel his legs giving in due to the emotional storm that roamed inside of him. At last he collapsed on the floor, Leo still embracing him from behind.

"_It's okay to cry__"_, repeated Leo.

Tears slowly started to run down his cheeks he finally let it all lose and let himself be held and comforted.


	2. Part 2

**Part 2**

They sat still on the floor of the Blue Room with their backs leaning on the bed. Jomy had stopped crying and leaned against Leo.

"Much have happened since I first came here, haven't it?" mumbled Jomy silently.

"_Yes"_ answered Leo simply. He could feel that his friend wasn't completely relaxed, so he didn't want to let go just yet. He hated when Jomy reflected too much on the past, sinking in to depression because of all the painful memories that haunted him. _"But all things wasn't bad"_

Jomy turned his head, so he could face the other man. He had a puzzled expression on his face. _"I got to meet you, didn't I?"_

Jomy blushed in reply. He turned his head away, trying to hide it.

"_And I you"_ came a thought to Leo, who smiled at this.

"I don't know what I would have done without your support…" he continued out loud now. "There was so many times when I just wanted it all to end, I never asked for any of this…"

Leo felt sad after hearing this, but at the same time he could understand him.

"But you know… Most of the time I'm happy that Blue interfered with my Adult exam… I'm grateful to have met you all. I miss all of our comrades we have lost during this journey, but it's for them and all our other companions that I'll continue fighting" Leo caught pictures of Karina, Blue, Kim, Harold, Artella, Cobb, Targion and many others leaking from Jomy's mind. "I don't want anything to in vain!"

"_You know? Soldier Blue couldn't have chosen a better successor"_

At this comment Jomy turned his head towards Leo yet again and smiled weakly. "Thank you"

"_Earlier __we got a message from Zel-dono. He said that he would meet up with us a scheduled and that he would like to transfer all of the hostages he and the others rescued from the station"_ Leo said trying to distract Jomy with something in the present and divert him from devilling in the past. At this comment he could feel Jomy's body tense again. He didn't ask why but opened his mind to his friend so that Jomy could feel that he worried about him.

"… my parents are on that station" he whispered so quietly that the words barely found their way to Leo's ears.

"_Do you want to meet them?"_ he asked.

"…" he got no other answer than silence, but he could feel the thoughts that roamed Jomy's mind. Without analysing it further, he loosened his arms that had held Jomy in his embrace, let him go and got up so that he was standing in front of him. _"Let's go"_ he said smiling his encouraging smile. Jomy's face darkened at this.

"…"

"_Dalton-san is right you know, they probably still think fondly of you_" Leo reached out his hand to help Jomy stand up.

Jomy looked at the hand. _"I'm afraid"_

"_Everyone is afraid sometimes, it's alright__"_ Leo said softly.

Jomy locked at the outstretched hand once again, and then he grabbed it and pulled himself up with the help of his friend. "Let's go find them" he said with resolution.

**---------------------------- End of part 2 ---------------------------**

Here's the second part, hope you'll like it, even though it's a really short (lack of time). I know it's kind of sappy but I couldn't resist… hahaha anyway please review! It always makes me really happy!!! I'll try to update as soon as I can…. But school is hell…. (No other explanation is needed…. *sighs*)


	3. Part 3

**---------------------------------- ****Part 3 ----------------------------------**

A man stood in the crowd, his arms around a woman and a little girl. The crowd was anxious; you could feel it in the air. The emotions of fear and uncertainty hung heavily, weighing on everybody's shoulders. He looked around and could see many different people. There were small children, teens and adults mixed together. But there was something that was similar about all of them. It was the expressions on everybody's faces, the expression of unease.

"Papa?" he could feel someone tugging on his shirt. He looked down on his daughter, Leticia. "Are you okay, papa?" she asked with a worried look on her face.

He smiled down at her "I'm fine Leticia"

"Dear, what do you think is going to happen to us?" wondered the woman who stood on his other side.

"I don't know" he sighed heavily. "I don't even understand what happened. But I guess that is why they have gathered us here, to tell us what's going on"

They had recently been transferred from another ship to what they understood to be the Mu's mother ship, the space whale. All they knew where that the station, were they had been held in quarantine had begun to fall into the atmosphere of Jupiter and that they had been saved by the Mu. William Shin couldn't understand why they were the ones to save them. After all, they were the enemies of the humans who would have rescued them if the whole thing had been an accident.

"Dear?" he looked at his wife who had a worried look on her face. He smiled reassuringly at her. 'The most important thing is that Maria and Leticia are safe and that we're together' he thought to himself.

"Everything is going to be fine" he said reassuringly.

In one end of the room, a door opened revealing a tall man with blond hair in front of a small group of Mu. He wore a short cape and wore clothes that were different from the others who entered the room behind him. His whole appearance displayed that he was a man of authority. He looked around the room, inspecting them as if he was trying to get an impression just by looking at them. They fell silent instantly.

"Welcome to the Shangri-La" he said. "I'm the captain, Harley." Silent whispers were heard in the crowd, but soon they died out.

The captain gazed over them one more time before he continued. "You may not know why you are here and what've happened. I'll tell you all you need to know at the moment, but I don't have the time to fill you in on everything. The truth may be hard to hear, but I promise that I only speak the truth."

The people in the crowd looked anxiously at one another. "The station where you were held was dropped into the atmosphere of Jupiter by Keith Anyan, hoping that it would stop us from reaching Terra."

Most of the people just stood there, not believing what they had heard. A few shouts were also heard, like 'it can't be true!' and 'you're lying!' Harley held up a hand to signal that he had more to say.

"You're not our prisoners, but our comrades and will be treated equally to all of us" he told them with a small smile. "I will leave you to them" he said with a hand gesture directed to his companions. "They will show you were you will be staying. I will have to return to the bridge now; I hope you will find your quarters comfortable." He ended and turned around and left them standing there.

A young man, not older than 25 if you judged by his appearance took a step forward and addressed them. "I'm Lucas and I'm in charge of getting you settled here on Shangri-La. We will take you in groups of three or more to your quarters, please be patient. We will fix something for you to eat as fast as we can."

William Shin turned to his family. "I told you it would be alright."

After an hour or so, the Shin family was in a small but comfortable room that they would have for themselves. They sat on one of the beds with plates with food in their hands. Leticia sat in between her parents and looked at her mom as she ate. She could somehow sense that something was bothering her mother, she looked so tired.

"Mama?" Maria turned her head toward her daughter. "Are you feeling well, mama?"

"Yes, you don't have to worry about me" her mother gave her a weak smile.

"I wonder what'll happen to us now?" said William.

"Papa, I think they seem nice, they saved us after all." Leticia turned her head to look at her father. "I would like to stay"

The two grown-ups looked at their daughter.

"Leticia…" her father began, but was interrupted by the door that opened. In the doorway stood a young man with blond hair. He was slender and wore the same type of clothes as the other Mu.

"_Excuse me"_he said without moving his lips. _"My name is Leo. I'm looking for someone and it would be kind of you if you could tell me your names"_

"Why does your voice resonate in my head?" wondered Leticia.

"_I'm speaking to you through telepathy"_ the man named Leo smiled kindly at her. _"I'm mute"_

William stood up, reaching out a hand toward Leo who took it in his own. "My name is William Shin; and this is my wife Maria and our daughter Leticia."

Leo's eyes widened at his words. _"Did you say Shin?"_ he asked.

"Yes" came the simple answer. Leo turned around and stuck his head out through the doorway and called: _"Soldier, I found them!"_

**---------------------------------- ****End of part 3 ----------------------------------**

Ok, part 3 is finally done! Just to warn you, the next part will probably be the last one. Please tell me if you find some grammar mistakes so that I can fix it.

Thank you for reading! Please read and review //**Bee**


	4. Part 4

**---------------------------------- ****Part 4 ----------------------------------**

The Shin family all looked toward the door. Then they heard footsteps nearing their quarters, the footsteps seemed hesitant. The person Leo had called over slowly made his way towards the door.

Leo looked at Jomy with an encouraging smile, he could see the different emotions that set of inside his friend, he could sense how badly he wanted to avoid this encounter, but also how badly he wanted to see the people that he cared for. Now, Jomy was only a few feet away from the door, just a few steps more and he would get to see his parents. He stopped, looked at Leo and said: _"I can't do this."_

"_Yes, you can__"_ Leo moved out into the corridor and grabbed his arm gently, but firmly. _"It's okay to be afraid."_

William had not moved from the spot where he'd stood and waited anxiously on what to come. He looked at his family seeing that they also were in the same place as before, both sitting on the bed, tensed. He returned his gaze to the door and saw Leo drag someone in through it, the unfamiliar person partly concealed by the shadows. The family squinted, trying to make out who it was; Leo had after all said that they had been searching for them, so it should be someone they knew. They could make out that this person clothing were different from the others, the long cape that he wore being the detail that stood out the most.

Then Maria and William saw his face and let out a gasp. Their eyes widened and they tried to figure out if their minds were playing a trick on them, because before them stood their son Jomy. He looked almost as he had done all those years ago, except he was taller and his hair had grown longer.

Slowly, Maria stood up and took a few steps toward him, so that she stood face to face with him. She reached out a hand to touch his face, not willing to believe her own eyes.

"Jomy?" she breathed.

"Mama"

"It can't be you" she stated. "It can't be."

He just stood there, with her hand cupping his cheek, looking into her eyes.

"Is it?" she looked into his eyes, returned his gaze, and set her other hand on his other cheek. He gave her a small smile and she gave out a squeak and embraced him, clinging on to him as if he would disappear into thin air. At first he was stunned by the act, but soon he regained his composure and retuned the embrace.

After a couple of moments, he raised his head from the crook of his mother neck and looked at his father. He still appeared to be in shock.

"Papa", they found each others eyes.

"How can this be?" Maria let go of her son and took a step back. "You look almost as you did when you left"

"_We__ can keep our appearance young if we like"_ Leo informed. _"For example, our captain, Harley is one of our elders who stole this ship at Altamira 300 years ago."_

"300 years ago?" William asked breathlessly.

"_Yes, we don't know how or why, maybe it's like compensation to the fact that almost all of us have some sort of disabilities" _Leo continued.

Jomy had stood still during the conversation, trying to read his parents reactions. He refused to use his telepathy to probe their minds for information; he wanted to respect their right of privacy. He also remembered how he had felt when he first arrived at the Shangri-La, frightened and confused. He wondered what they where feeling.

Then he felt someone touch his mind lightly. Since he was not expecting any enemy attacks, he opened his mind in return, welcoming the contact.

"_Who are you?"_ came a voice that sounded like a little girls voice. Jomy tried to detect where it came from. His gaze fell on Leticia.

"_I'm Jomy"_ he answered. He smiled at her, left their mother's side and knelt before her looking into her eyes. He almost expected that she would draw back in fear; he wouldn't have blamed her if she had done that, but she didn't move an inch.

"Are you Leticia?" she nodded. "I'm a friend; you have nothing to fear from me."

"Are you a Mu?" she asked growing more confident and relaxed in the strangers company.

"Yes I am" he answered honestly, not daring to turn around to see his parents' reactions. They continued to look at each other trying to find out as much as they could without speaking.

After a while William spoke up again. "How did you come here?"

"Leo here, and a man called Soldier Blue, rescued me after I failed my adult exam, and I was brought here" he answered as he rose to face his parents again and sent an image of Blue to them. William and Maria flinched, due to the fact that they weren't used to communicate with telepathy. Leticia on the other hand welcomed the warm, but sad, memory.

"How come, you are dressed differently from the other Mu?" Leticia asked. Jomy squirmed at the question.

"I'm their leader, the current Soldier" he answered stiffly. Secretly he had hoped that he hadn't had to tell them about what station he had among the Mu, but when the question was asked, there was no point in not telling the truth.

The Shin family gasped, realising that this man, their former son was the head of their former enemy. Jomy was the one, who had ordered the attacks from the Mu's side.

"I was entrusted this post by Blue" he continued. "He made me promise to pursue his dreams, which also are mine now. I promised that I would lead his people, his family to Terra and that is what I'll do. No matter what." He said with resolution in his voice. They stood silent for a while, but at last Leticia broke the silence.

"You are not a bad person" she said, smiling sweetly at him. At first he didn't register what she had said but then asked: "How can you tell?"

"I can sense it" at this, Jomy smiled. William and Maria recognised the smile they had so often seen all those years ago and relaxed. Whatever he had done, he was still their son and that wouldn't change.

Later that afternoon they waked around in the park below the bridge, telling each other of the years that had passed. Not seeing your son/parents in such a long time left some serious catching up to do. They really enjoyed themselves. Leo felt at ease when he saw some of the old Jomy shine through, he'd missed his carefree attitude ever since he started changing after Naska.

At the moment Leticia told an entertaining story about Jomy's former teacher who'd accidentally slipped in the dining hall on a banana peel. Suddenly Jomy felt someone touching his mind; he lowered his guard and felt Harley's presence.

"_Soldier Shin, where are you?"_ he asked urgently.

"_Harley, is there any trouble?"_

"_We just received a message from the humans; they say they wish to negotiate with us."_

"_What did you say?!"_

"_You should come to the bridge immediately to discuss the matter."_

"_I understand, I'm on my way"_

Jomy now turned to his companions with a big smile on his face.

"We just received a message from the humans; they wish to negotiate with us." He informed them happily.

"_Soldier, that's wonderful!"_ Leo smiled brightly.

Maria, William and Leticia Shin also smiled at him, but he could sense that they were a little confused, not long ago they had been their enemies also.

"Papa, Mama, I need to go now, I'm needed on the bridge" he said sadly, not wanting to leave them so soon, but he knew it was necessary. "Leo could you please continue to show them around?" he asked his friend.

"_Of course"_

"Thank you"

"_I'll see you later"_

He gave his mother a quick hug, shook his fathers hand and also gave Leticia a hug. In the short time they had contact he directed his thoughts to her sending her a message. _"Don't forget your precious memories"_ he said. _"There is something you've lost that you need to regain, but I sure you'll find it someday"_

He turned took a few steps then faced them yet again. He waved and then disappeared into thin air leaving them in the beautiful garden.

**---------------------------------- ****Fin**** ----------------------------------**

Okay, now I'm finally finished with this fic (my first I must ad, and I'm damned proud about it!). I had some problems with how I thought Jomy's parents would react when they saw their long lost son. That's why I it took so long writing this part xD. I don't know if I'm pleased with the ending, but I've kind of lost my inspiration so I tried my best at least to get I finished. Please review if you have the time, I really appreciate when I get constructive criticism (I want to be get better). Please tell me if there are any grammar mistakes.

Thank you for reading this fic!

**//****Bee**

**Thanks:**

**Arcayne:** Thank you so much for your reviews! Each time it made me smile, I love to get reviews from people who appreciated my story. Especially when it's constructive! Your comments really made me think about the story, how the people should react in different situations and so on. Anyway, I hope I'll have time to write some more fanfics about Toward the Terra. If so, I hope you will take the time to read it :D

**Yuki****:** Thank you for your review. I must say that I also always wanted Jomy to meet his parents again, so when I saw the series again, I decided to write this. Hope you enjoyed the ending.

**Simoun Sibylla: **Thank you for your reviews! Hope you liked the ending!

**Isis: **Thank you for the review! I know it's kind of short but I've a hard time finding time to write. Glad you liked it though, hope the ending worked for you.


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